The First Seven Years: Foundations of the Psyche and the Journey to Rebirth

What Did the World Teach You Before You Learned Words?

Before words, the world spoke to us in the language of sensation. Before we could name emotions like joy, grief, or love, we felt them deeply, etched into our beings in a way that no words could describe. These pre-verbal experiences are the body’s first language, communicating far deeper than any words ever could. They are the unspoken codes that shape our understanding of the world before we have the tools to articulate them. These sensations become the foundation of our emotional landscape, etched into the very fibers of our being, whispering their lessons from the cradle into the depths of our adulthood.

As my mother recalls a memory from my infancy, I am reminded of how early experiences shape us—not just in our minds, but in our bodies. At just nine months old, my father—eager to teach me numbers—smacked me when I failed to respond as expected. His actions reflected the norms of our village, where discipline often carried a heavy hand. Though I have no memory of that moment, its resonance lived on, for that heavy hand has been shaping my sense of worth and vulnerability for nearly 19 years.

Neuroscience reveals that emotions, particularly those experienced during our formative years, imprint themselves on our bodies as cellular memories. Dr. Gabor Maté emphasizes that these imprints shape our adult selves, influencing behavior, relationships, and self-perception. Discipline meant to teach became a lesson in shame, fear and guilt carried silently but deeply into adulthood.

The First Seven Years: A Cellular Blueprint

The first seven years of life serve as a fertile plain, where the seeds of our identity are planted. During this time, our brain exists in a state of deep absorption, soaking in not just the actions of caregivers but the emotional undercurrents of our environment. This is when we learn not just what is said, but what is felt. If the world around us feels harsh, punitive, or unsafe, we don’t have the cognitive ability to question or challenge it. Instead, we internalize it.

For a child, punishment doesn’t mean my caregiver is unfair —it becomes; I am bad. The lack of a framework to process these moments means they become absorbed into the core of our identity, establishing foundational beliefs that carry through life. I learned early to associate vulnerability with danger, creativity with rebellion, and joy with restraint.

These early emotional lessons live on within us as cellular memories, influencing not just our thoughts but how we physically embody them—tense shoulders, shallow breaths, and guarded hearts. This is the emotional language of the body, one that shapes how we navigate relationships and the world around us.

 
Domestication and the Emotional Cage

Many of us grow up under a collective system of domestication, a silent programming that teaches us to suppress parts of ourselves to fit into society’s mold. We learn that anger, creativity, and wild joy are not acceptable, and to survive, we bury them deep within. For someone like me, with a rich emotional landscape and a deep instinct for creativity, this repression feels doubly intense.

To protect myself from these powerful emotions, I built walls. I armored myself against the very aspects of my being that made me whole. This internal conflict, this war of repression and expression, raged for years, only beginning to subside when I chose to descend into the underworld of my repressed self—the same journey we see reflected in ancient and current mythology. 

 
Inanna’s Descent: A Myth for Healing

The ancient Sumerian myth of Inanna, Queen of Heaven and Earth, offers a profound mirror to this process of self-reclamation. Inanna’s descent into the underworld is not a punishment—it is a deliberate, sacred act of self-discovery. Stripped of her adornments, titles, and roles, Inanna descends to confront her shadow, her sister Ereshkigal, Queen of the Underworld. This journey mirrors our own: it is not about fixing or avoiding our pain, but about embracing it, learning from it, and integrating it into who we are becoming.

Just as Inanna’s journey is an essential part of the mythic cycle of life, we are all called to descend at some point, into the deep, shadowed places within ourselves. This descent is a necessary process of integration, not to banish the shadow but to allow it to merge with the light. When we descend into the emotional underworld of our past pain and trauma, we are not condemned—we are being refined.

Inanna’s return from the underworld is not a triumphant, celebratory moment but a quiet, intentional rebirth. She emerges not as someone different but as someone transformed, carrying with her the wisdom of her journey. Similarly, when we choose to confront our own shadows, we rise with a deeper understanding of who we are. For me, dance became one of the most profound practices for this inner work—moving my body allows me to bypass the rational defenses of the mind and unlock what words cannot express.

 
Integration: The Mother of Resurrection

To truly heal, we must transcend the dualities of our existence—shame and joy, fear and freedom, light and shadow. These are not opposites but parts of a unified whole. Healing requires us to integrate the polarities within us, to allow ourselves to be fully human.

For me, this journey has been one of rediscovery. It’s in those moments where I allow my voice to tremble as I speak my truth or embrace vulnerability, even when the fear of rejection still lingers. As a society, we often vilify emotions, labeling them as weak or irrational. But emotions are not the enemy; they are the body’s way of communicating and guiding us on our journey toward wholeness.

 
Practical Tools for Integration

Now that we have explored the mythic and psychological foundation of healing, we can look at practical tools for integration—ways to bring our healing into the body, where the emotions are stored. These tools are not meant to erase the shadows but to invite them into the light for integration.

Dance with Intention: Dance is a sacred practice of embodiment. Create a space for movement, one that allows your body to express what cannot be said. Focus on your breath and let your body guide you toward release.
Breathwork for Release: Engage in simple box breathing to clear emotional tension. Inhale for four counts, hold for four, exhale for four, and hold again. Visualize the breath clearing away residues of emotional stagnation.
Journaling Prompts: Reflect on the parts of yourself that you have hidden away. Ask yourself: What parts of myself have I hidden due to shame?
What would it feel like to reclaim those parts?

Rituals for Release: Create a sacred space for release. Write down your emotions, then burn the paper, symbolizing the letting go of what no longer serves you.
Aromatherapy and Massage Therapy: Sometimes, the body needs help to release its tension. Essential oils, like lavender and rose, help calm the nervous system, while massage therapy targets chronic tension that holds onto emotional residues. For more info and for booking a session please  Click Here
 

An Invitation to the Underworld

If this message resonates with you, I offer a simple invitation: descend. Not in despair, but with courage, to reclaim the parts of yourself you have hidden away for fear of judgment or rejection. Let yourself feel what you were once taught to suppress. And when you are ready, rise—not as who you were, but as who you are becoming.

Through movement, breath, and ritual, we can transmute the pain that has been carried through the body for years, integrating our shadows and stepping into the fullness of our human selves. The body remembers, and it also forgives.

Your path of healing is your own, but it is also ancient. It has been written in the stars and lived by countless souls before us. Just as Inanna emerged from her descent transformed, so too will you, carrying the wisdom of all you have integrated. The journey is not linear—it is cyclical, like the dance of planets and constellations across the sky. We descend to rise again, and through this, we learn to embrace the fullness of who we are becoming.

Thank you for joining me on this sacred journey. May you find the courage to descend into the depths of your own soul and rise with the power of a transformed heart.

With love, always,
Alina